Newspapers / The Guilfordian (Greensboro, N.C.) / April 1, 1988, edition 1 / Page 1
Part of The Guilfordian (Greensboro, N.C.) / About this page
This page has errors
The date, title, or page description is wrong
This page has harmful content
This page contains sensitive or offensive material
// ' DODGERS' p 2 /NUDE BEACH NEW COURSE jf DEBAUCHERY f p. 2 yr LISTINGS p. 4 flmnojFaAisaaiiEN® ™ Guilford Not 150 Years Old! '--"' " ?/'*'•' ? y ■ * 1 HL : ''' : ''-'''' "' "i¥m 11 I iinm-rin J mm. i jKr 1l Cafeteria Renovated By Trub DeCarte Plans for remodeling Guilford's cafeteria are well under way. Architects were flown in from New York to look at the present area and interior decorators arrived from Italy. Conferences with Jim Newlib, Guilford's Financial Director and Nancy Cable-Walls, Guilford's interior &|g £% V APRIL designer will begin next week. There will be a 60 feet high ceiling with a crystal chandelier valued at over 1 million dollars. The room will include seating capacity for 10,000 people. This renovation will also include an orchestra pit for special events such as formal dances and IST By Menage A. Quatre Ramond Fickey, curator of the Quaker Collection, has been charged with releasing fradulent infor mation claiming Guilford College is 150 years old. Fickey, also head of the In ternational Quaker Con gress on Education, ap parently used his access to Quaker documents to gain prestige and honor with the Friends. Hot-Windy Divine, a postal worker, dropped a letter in the postal office which contained the truthful documents citing Guilford College only at it's 69th birthday. Mrs. See, retrieving the fallen letter, saw the official presidential banquets. This addition comos after increasing cost? of the Rogers' presidential ban quets at the Ritz-Carlton in Naples, Florida. There will also be no stu dent workers in the new cafeteria. Rather, the School has decided to hire a waiting staff from Monaco and the Reagan's White House chef will head up the new cooking staff which has been under the reins of Tim Fryree. Jim Newlib said that these changes are a result on continued complaints of poor food, slow service, and after discovering a surplus in the School's budget well in excess of 100 million dollars. Newlib added, "We are, and con tinue to be concerned for our students' welfare and happiness. This has always been a concern of mine and the administra tions. With continued renovations, we plan to uphold the standards and traditions that have been inherent in this fine in stitution of higher learn ing." Friends stamp on the document. As she often does with intriguing mail she took it to her desk to examine the contents. In her excitement she dropped her lit cigarette into a bundle of mail, which quickly ignited the mailroom. The document, miraculously turned up in a Penthouse forum letter when Thrill Rogers mistakenly included the wrong document in an envelope. The Associate Academic Dean Granne Blunder, an avid reader of (he Forum, picked up a copy at the Open Panty, I mean Pan try. So, anyway, they got together and decided that they ought to keep this one under wraps, so to speak. Welcome Jim and Tammy By Trub DeCarte On a comeback attempt by Jim and Tammy Bak ker, the evangelical couple has announced plans to move to Guilford. They make this move for two reasons, first to convert the Quakers to Baptists, and second to increase Guilford's endowment to SIOO million within six months. They will also be residing at Little Heritage, m 1988 They talked to Fickey and verbally reprimanded him and decided to let the whole thing slide. Mrs. See, who mean while was perusing extra, non-forwarded magazines, found the letter and remembered having read it. After relating it to Win dy, all Hell broke loose. Windy immediately brought it to the attention of the media who did not think that it should take precedence over the "On-Campus Pet Policy" article and chose not to run it. Fickey will be publically stoned on Monday. The format of the stoning has been designed by Old Testament scholar Loe Blowes. Y'all come out. v'hear? formerly Ragsdale House and plan to clean Guilford's lake in order to make a water park, an ex act replica of the original, one which is just south of Charlotte. At a news conference. Tammy was quoted as saying, "Jimmy and I were so distraught at be ing kicked out of Heritage U.S.A., and have been looking for a new home. We feel that Guilford Col lege is that perfect new home."
The Guilfordian (Greensboro, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
April 1, 1988, edition 1
1
Click "Submit" to request a review of this page. NCDHC staff will check .
0 / 75